Breakthrough in efforts to save Europe's last big cat

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/europe/breakthrough-in-efforts-to-save-europes-last-big-cat-801772.html

This story isn't quite what Fluffy expected - it's not about cats that like their food, but about lynxes.

Fluffy knows what a big cat is, and he knows what a Lynx is. (see the pictures, you can't get confused)

Mozarella

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mozarella

kittens like mozarella (especially on their pizzas) but it sticks to their whiskers

Frog with a broken leg

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article.html?in_article_id=128956&in_page_id=34

This frog broke his leg. Fluffy hopes he doesn't croak.

Remarkable prodigy kitten

this kitten is able to express his emotions through fur.

http://cbs4.com/pets/cat.kitten.fur.2.684376.html

Fluffy approves.

Ballet donkey retires

a donkey called Monika has retired as a ballerina in Russia - and she's only 21.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/7311990.stm

Fluffy likes donkeys.

However he prefers breakdancing to ballet

The sound of one paw clapping

A stupid dog is pretending to be a buddhist.

http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5jDQDHYJIy5-9Oyt5kzcpViL_3DqgD8VJP0LO0

Fluffy says that if a dog falls over in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, it doesn't make a noise. Which doesn't matter, because dogs are rubbish anyway.

Hybrid Animals

A cardinal has objected to the new Embryology bill in the House of Commons. It will allow creating hybrid animal/human combos

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/scotland/7308224.stm

Kitten is in favour of the bill because he would like to be a cross between himself and Evel Knievel, or a cross between him and Steve Ovett - that way he could either drive a motorbike or run dead fast.

By all accounts this particular Cardinal objects to pretty much everything, anyway.

sinister dog people

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tyne/7304452.stm

this couple wear jumpers made from dog hair. Fluffy guesses that they smell.

Cat injustice

http://www.intelligencer.ca/ArticleDisplay.aspx?e=947165

this cat appears to have been framed. he might just have been given these goods, or may have retreived them from the real thief.

Man gets shot - still goes for fish and chips

http://www.theage.com.au/news/national/with-a-bullet-in-his-brain-a-timor-soldier-goes-for-fishnchips/2008/03/14/1205472085351.html

this man got shot in the head but still went for fish and chips. Kitten likes fish and chips.

Silly Nicaraguans

Silly Nicaraguans take their dogs to church - which is pointless, because they're rubbish.

http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSN0940354220080310

The budget

There is still VAT on cat food - nuff said. Alistair may be someone's darling but he's not Fluffy's. Even though he has a cat called Sybill.

http://scotlandonsunday.scotsman.com/12702/Bill-Jamieson-Dont-bet-on.3858639.jp

Bank Holidays

there's a petition to get another bank holiday. Fluffy loves bank holidays - they're especially useful when he has three things to do - normal weekends aren't long enough.

http://www.thomascook.com/content/free/day/homepage.asp

businessmen might disgree because it'll hurt profits but if they had their way, children would still be up chimneys, cleaning them with brushes made of live kittens.

Cats can save your life

http://health.usnews.com/usnews/health/healthday/080221/cats-help-shield-owners-from-heart-attack.htm

having a cat stops you getting heart disease. No such results were found to be true of dogs. the scientists are trying to make excuses, but in the final analysis dogs are rubbish.

Dog Scandal - who cares

http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/uk-world-news/2008/03/07/crufts-rocked-by-betting-scandal-86908-20342588/

There has been suspicious betting on rubbish event "Crufts." Apparently there are rumours of an unknown "Superdog" in the utility category who is sure to win.

Fluffy has a number of points

1) Crufts is rubbish

2) Dogs are rubbish

3) There is no such thing as a "superdog"

4) Utility dogs are ones that can do the hoovering.

Chinese People have the right idea about eating

In china, "fat" is a complement. Fluffy would like to owned by a chinese person. One in five people is chinese so it shouldn't b e too hard to arrange.

http://uk.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUKPEK24236920080305

clumsy cats

http://www.saveborrowspend.co.uk/articles/news/1181-doggy-disasters-and-cat-astrophes-cause-chaos

the clumsiest cats in Britain are in the West Midlands. They keep having to go to the vet. Fluffy has mixed feelings about vets.

Mouse Problem

A mouse has been seeing going into the Ivy restaurant in London. Fluffy reckons they need to get a cat - possibly one with a bow tie.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=523692&in_page_id=1770

new leopard

http://www.theage.com.au/news/world/bconservationb-precious-leopard-cub-says-hello/2008/02/29/1204226988032.html

a new leopard has been born. Fluffy thinks he looks like his friend Spotty.